Monday, February 4, 2013

My Top Baby/Toddler Tips

These few things helped me so much I thought i'd share them with well whoever you are or whoever you may know and pass on this information to!

Dunstan Baby Language
My sister was put onto this DVD which was truly amazing! We honestly could understand every cry max had in the first 3 months. We practised on other babies and it worked too. I felt so empowered. I knew exactly what MY baby wanted. NO one could tell me otherwise, in that being a younger mum I felt like everyone may of felt the need to give constant advice. It’s not just silly either. When a baby wants to feed, for example, they want to suck so they move their tongue to the roof of their mouth. But then they start crying so the cry comes out like a ‘neh’ sound. There are more but I’ll let you look into it! As with Tizzie Hall, it is so important to listen to babies cry’s to know what they want. After all how would you like it if you wanted to have a whinge to a friend about something bothering you and you were shushed – or even stuck something in your mouth to quieten you down? When I listened to max’s cry and knew well it was pretty amazing!

SAVE OUR SLEEP
There is a lot of debate when it comes to the best way to help a baby to sleep. It has got to be one of the hardest things parents I talk to face. To be honest, we didn’t have much trouble. This is because the day Maxwell arrived home from the hospital, he slept all the next morning. I called my sister asking if this was normal as I thought he needed breast milk every 2 hours! She said, “well, yeah, but they have one long sleep and since it’s in the morning it means you will likely be up all night every two hours feeding.” Pause. I’m freaking out. I just went through labour and now the idea of not sleeping floors me. C’mon I hear you say, you knew you’d give up sleep when you have a baby right? Well, yeah. Sure. But after labour the reality did not feel good. Now I’d already told my sister I wasn’t really into the whole ‘routine’ thing – I wanted to be natural and go with the flow... so when I blurted out “how do I fix it!?!?” she replied with “well that’s the whole routine thing... you’ve got to get the long sleep to be at night. Ahh. Made sense.  So after her visiting and showing me what the routine was all about, I was halfway sold. Next she went out and bought me this book. Admittedly it is not the easiest book to read. If I didn’t have my lovely sister there to ask her to explain things I may have given up. But seeing her apply it with her daughter who was only 6 months ahead, and seeing it work gave me confidence it could for me too. Also if you are interested but it sounds a bit too hard, I recommend going to Tizzie Halls’ website and downloading pdf sheets which in my opinion explain very well the importance of the 7pm bedtime and self settling. I’ve looked at other routine books and they are all pretty much the same. Why? Because they have studied babies and know this is their natural rhythm. Max loved it. He settled into it very well and the best part was having people wonder why he is such a good baby not hardly crying. Why? Because he always got what he needed just as he started to realise he needed it.
 I felt great, in control – something I needed to keep me going through the shock of being a mother. Then the Idea of self settling! I thought it sounded like controlled crying which I have never liked the sound of. Actually Tizzie hall is rather against it as it involves going in and out almost teasing the baby and also not listening to the babies cry. In self settling I loved that she explained an emotional cry and so I knew if max did this I was to go in right away and comfort him and stay with him til he fell asleep. She explains the way a tired cry sounds too so I could be comforted to know he was just learning to put himself to sleep. For my husband and I, we liked the idea of not needing to sleep with them, rock them, use a dummy etc. We love him dearly and would have done those things, but thinking even 5 years ahead, I really didn’t know if I could cope with him running into our room to sleep every night.
There is a whole lot more to this concept, but for me I’ll just say, I’ve just put Max down at 7pm, and not heard a peep. I will not likely hear anything til 7 or later in the morning. You rock Tizzie Hall!
(Noted: All babies and toddler are different! But this tested book has worked for many!)

 Love and logic Magic for Early Childhood

Around the time Maxwell hit 16 months and onwards, I found no form of discipline to work. He was too young for most techniques, or they simply didn’t work! He acted like I had no right to say anything and it was driving me batty! I don’t mind Jo Frost, Super nanny, and use a few techniques, but to be honest, one particularly bad day, I hopped online and some lovely person recommended “Love and Logic Magic” It was amazing! Max responded so well! You basically use empathy instead of anger when you respond. And no warmings. Sounds a bit harsh but well, life doesn’t give warnings. Especially for under 3years if you give warnings they are likely to push and push and see how far they will go. Also a key word or Phrase is all that is needed. Okay so say my 19 month old Max throws his bowl of food on the floor. “How sad. Dinner is over.” Action: Promptly remove Max and stick to my word – dinner is over. He doesn’t starve. He learns by the very next meal, no more throwing food or I will go hungry! As they get older the techniques involve questioning – what do you think you should do? It’s a great great read for any parent who is struggling to find a comfortable disciplining technique. Reacting with anger – physical or verbal- makes the child angry at you. The adult is the problem. Using a key word and a consequence shines light on the action of the child which was wrong. It wasn’t them, or you, but the action. They learn very quickly!

Tena DVD of Excercises

Not just pelvic floor but a whole range of exercies to get your tummy and back, your core back to normal! Only a half hour routine, one during pregnancy, another routine for post birth. So easy to fit in, not too intense and FREE to your door!
Sleeping Bags

If your baby constantly wakes between about 3- 4:30 it is VERY likely they are cold. In Australia in particular, being hotter during the day we under dress our bubs and when it gets colder at night they are not quite warm enough. Tizzie hall has a pdf on her website which actually lists how many layers of blanket and clothing for babies or varied ages in varying temperatures AND in varying areas! She really has accounted for everything. In the end if you aren’t dressing them in warm clothes, a sleeping bag and blankets, and your baby wakes at these times, well you know what to do! The advantage of a well fitting (your own head should not be able to pass through the head hold of a sleeping bag or the baby can slip down as they are smaller, and potentially not be able to get out or breathe) sleeping bag is no matter if they slip out of the blankets, they will be warm. It is harder for them to climb out! And I found for max it was a nice signal for bedtime! They can also be used in a car seat or pram as they have a neat little slot at the back for a seat belt.

 The double wrap
How annoying but terribly cute is it when a baby slips their arms out of their wrap cause they are just so clever, but then startle themselves and wake up?! Answer: The Double wrap... 1, 2,3,4 steps which just about ensure those arms stay nice and wrapped!
 

Some awesome Books:
The Don’t Panic guide to birth - A funny read when you are due. i think it’s about 5 mins a chapter. NO pressure! The title explains why it’s good.

Conception Pregnancy and Birth – The first book we bought upon the news of being pregnant. Amazing to see the babies growth every four weeks! (It did however become known as the “booby book” as it also shows the changes in the mother’s body!)

Pregnancy and Birth The essential Australia checklists – get this for your first pregnancy!

Planning with Kids – A fellow Blogger! Awesome for more than one child, or the preparation of!

Raising Boys- I only have sisters, so I was so clueless when it comes to boys. I know I know they aren’t that different as babies... but this book showed up a few things like the way they play is different and that it’s very important to give them more love and affection in the ages 1-3 as it will ingrain the idea of it being okay to have emotions! Good read. There is one for girls too.

How to choose the sex of your baby by LB Shettles and Davif Rorvik – scientific I am not lying. I now know a fair few people who have said this worked for them. It is a very interesting informative read. If/when I decide to have another; this might be something I’ll pull out to read again. Depends on if you have a preference with your next child. If not – meh!
 
If anyone knows of other awesome things - books or otherwise that helped them i'd love to know! I know what worked for me might not work for others, but things that helped me SOO much I felt I just had to share!
I'm sure I"m forgetting something!
bxx

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